Growing Up Reserve

  • Published
  • By Staff Sgt. Shawn Rhodes
  • 927th Air Refueling Wing
Trinity, Fla. --  For many children, the first memory of their father may be a stubbly face or a deep voice. For Kevin Porath, the first memory he has of his father is a little different.

"It was the flight suit," he said.

Kevin Porath, now 17, had an upbringing only a special few experience. His father was a pilot in the Air Force Reserves, a job that would move the family from Michigan to Barbados. Fortunately for Kevin, no matter where he went in the world he was always around his Air Force family. It was this special bond that would shape his childhood, influence his education and guide his future.

"I joined the reserves in 1993," said Maj. Mark Porath (Retired), a pilot with the 63rd Air Refueling Squadron, part of the 927th Air Refueling Wing at MacDill Air Force Base, Fla. "That was literally right before Kevin was born. His mom was seven months pregnant when I went to officer training."

Kevin wouldn't have to wait until he joined the Air Force himself to wear the flight suit he envied. When he was 4, Major Porath found a child-sized flight suit, had captain's bars sewn on it, and brought his son along to an air show.

"Kevin was giving tours of the aircraft to visitors," Major Porath said. "How many (four year-olds) know what a tanker is?"

He added that it was fitting, seeing as Kevin was a 'captain' while his father was only a lieutenant.

When not at an air show, Kevin lived the life of a normal kid - school, weekends off, and neighborhood friends. Major Porath would sometimes leave for a few days at a time, but never for a long deployment. That changed one day when Major Porath was ordered to serve in Barbados - a seven month deployment that he could take with or without his family.

So instead of going to the 6th grade, Kevin went to live in the Caribbean.

"We were so excited to be with dad and experience something new," Kevin said.

"In Barbados, working in the embassy, we were like a family," Major Porath added. "To be able to live in Barbados and see what the average person lives like, it makes us realize how blessed we are."

Kevin's mother Lisa began home-schooling Kevin and his younger brother when they went to Barbados. When they returned to the states, she continued to home-school them while Major Porath served with the 927th.

"As a reservist and aircrew member, I was still gone quite a bit," Major Porath said. "I was probably on the road two weeks a month."

While such an absence would cause stress on many families, the Poraths knew how to pull together.

"It helps you prioritize your time at home," Major Porath said of his family's strategy. "It really gives you an appreciation for the (sevicemembers' families) in Iraq and Afghanistan."

Like many reservists who come to depend on extended military orders to cover many household expenses, Major Porath often worried about whether there would be a paycheck the next month.

"The challenging thing was knowing you wanted to remain on orders if they were available," Major Porath said.

Surprisingly, this was a bigger stressor for Kevin than the move to Barbados.

"(Availability of orders) was an uncertainty for our family," Kevin said. "I thought we might have to move. That was when there was the most stress for us."

The military mindset influenced the entire family. When faced with such an uncertainty, they banded together and took care of each other.

"Being in that situation is a real-life lesson in doing what you have to do," Lisa said.

Homelessness was something the Poraths never had to experience. Major Porath found a job as an air reserve technician with the unit, a job that allowed him a secure paycheck. He retired from the military a few months ago, leaving a legacy that Kevin is eager to embrace.

"I've always had respect for folks in the Air Force and really looked up to them," Kevin said.

But what does a 17 year-old who is home-schooled do to be involved in the Air Force Reserves? The answer for Kevin was working to help other teens in reserve families like his.

"I got a call asking if I was interested in attending a teen leadership summit," Kevin said. "It was all Air Force Reserve and Air National Guard kids like me, emphasizing Air Force qualities."

It was easy for Kevin to make friends with everyone at the camp - they all had parents in the reserves or guard.

"I was one of 16 teens accepted to the teen leadership council," Kevin said. As an added bonus, being on the council gets him a step closer to fulfilling his life's dream of being an Air Force pilot:

"I have pre-candidate status to get into the Air Force Acadamy," Kevin said.

For Kevin, being part of a reserve family means having an instant connection with other military children, one he shared with the members of the teen leadership summit and teen leadership council.

"I feel more connected. When I meet folks who never had the military (background), they are more isolated," Kevin said. "When I meet someone even if they are in another military branch, we have an instant connection."

As a result of his upbringing and close family, Kevin is on the way to achieving his goals.
"Because I was raised in the reserves, I have more of an idea of what I want to do with my life - I know what direction I'm going in."

The Air Force Reserve Teen Leadership Council raises community awareness so others can understand the unique stressors faced by military families and offer community support. If you are a military family that would like to be a part of future events that would help your family connect with other military families, contact Kevin at 727-372-7502. He is working to build a database of local military families in order to be able to coordinate a network of support in the community.